DiViNE EViL DiViNE EViL: Conflicting Merits


Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Conflicting Merits

It meant nothing more to you, as how it would if I were in this situation as well. I'd have to say I'm mildly satisfied with how things turned out. I didn't mess up too badly and you appreciated my effort, but somehow put me in a weird situation. In your eagerness you might have not realised, of course...

Coincidentally on the morning of the actual day, I woke up with the onset of symptoms of my recurring vertigo. I did what I could to prevent it from manifesting into the full-fledged horror I had experienced twice before, and I'd have to say I think it worked out quite well. Though I still have mild vertigo, nothing worse will be triggered if I maintain a normal position, though my sleeping positions are limited in such a way that I may become stiff after not moving for too long.

That aside, I hope my working momentum continues forward more than just via my plans and thoughts. In my mind, all types of forms and structures start to materialise, but coming up with the actual content is the main obstacle. Not to mention, for once, academics come into play...the semester, my first year here, is about to end, and with it, a regurgitation of what I've learnt...or have I yet?

As for now, a musical represention of emotions, replaced by sorrowful tunes...mysterious patterns...eloquent melodies...flood my mind, and are yearning to be materialised and reproduced. And there's no longer any forseeable deadline to continue driving this force forward. But it's what I desire, what I appreciate, and what I ultimately live my life for. This is my true aspiration, my true dream. It starts here. Whether I'm successful or not...that's another story. I have to at least satisfy my own conscience. The first step is paved...now I have to continue building the path, even though I have no idea where it leads to. But I do know it will bring me to new, unexplored places, away from the static encirclement of monotonousness, restricted by ignorance.

Let us proceed...and retrieve.
JLam posted this at 19:42


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