DiViNE EViL
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Not so Wonderful
So this is it. End of another average holiday that I really needed, actually. And while most other students still have one week of holiday, I'll (and my schoolmates) will be having our Mid-year Examinations. Tomorrow. Our holiday has ended, because it started early due to something that I'm not sure I have mentioned before but I'm not going to mention now.
Which is unfair really because we, theoretically have one week less to study.
Not that it matters anyway; we will all end up like that. Like that. I've asked many other people what they have been doing for the whole holiday, and yeah...they give answers that they had been slacking, doing nothing, lazing around...but it still gives the feeling that their Mid-year examination results will somehow end up better than mine. It is just them being humble or me just having a bad way of studying and revising.
Or is it confidence. Yes, confidence is something that I lack. Quite badly. Ever since the start of my life. I guess that's just natural then.
Of course, following the creeds of EViL, changes can always be induced by others, for better or worse. However, even after a surge of confidence, it will always return to the low points after a while. No idea why this happens.
As for studies, my father imposed a 'rule' that made me study at least three hours for every day of this holiday. I did...yeah. Really. Except for the Sundays and a few other days. However, I don't feel the confidence in myself...I'm still unsure in many parts of Physics and Mathematics. Not to mention I didn't even touch General Paper (not that I know how) and Geography (Just reading and stuff...). Somehow my attempt at speaking Chinese has, in my opinion, become more fluent, but still, I didn't revise the new terms and...the textbook, in general.
I think, I have noticed myself, that I type too much about me and myself. I will attempt to widen my scope, but what I know is, I'm just expressing thoughts into this blog. If I do think of other things to type, I would probably be on a roll with that topic anyway.
That's why, it's not so Wonderful after all.
Which is unfair really because we, theoretically have one week less to study.
Not that it matters anyway; we will all end up like that. Like that. I've asked many other people what they have been doing for the whole holiday, and yeah...they give answers that they had been slacking, doing nothing, lazing around...but it still gives the feeling that their Mid-year examination results will somehow end up better than mine. It is just them being humble or me just having a bad way of studying and revising.
Or is it confidence. Yes, confidence is something that I lack. Quite badly. Ever since the start of my life. I guess that's just natural then.
Of course, following the creeds of EViL, changes can always be induced by others, for better or worse. However, even after a surge of confidence, it will always return to the low points after a while. No idea why this happens.
As for studies, my father imposed a 'rule' that made me study at least three hours for every day of this holiday. I did...yeah. Really. Except for the Sundays and a few other days. However, I don't feel the confidence in myself...I'm still unsure in many parts of Physics and Mathematics. Not to mention I didn't even touch General Paper (not that I know how) and Geography (Just reading and stuff...). Somehow my attempt at speaking Chinese has, in my opinion, become more fluent, but still, I didn't revise the new terms and...the textbook, in general.
I think, I have noticed myself, that I type too much about me and myself. I will attempt to widen my scope, but what I know is, I'm just expressing thoughts into this blog. If I do think of other things to type, I would probably be on a roll with that topic anyway.
That's why, it's not so Wonderful after all.
